Morning Muse 2: Malice arises because there is fear of loss (Relationship)

To love something big, something enormous you have to become vast. As long as you stay small, there is no joy, there is no happiness, there is no peace. Joy is in expansion, becoming big in your heart.

This can only happen when you are in love, and do not want to possess what you love.

When we love something, we want to possess it. If you appreciate a painting, you want to buy it and keep it in your home. You find a beautiful garment, and although you know you will wear it only a couple of times, you buy it and put it in the closet. You have known only one way of loving — love it, possess it and forget it.

When you try to possess love, you rob it of its beauty, and then that same love gives you pain. Whoever you love, you try to dictate terms to them. In a very subtle way you try to rule them and whatever you try to control turns ugly.

This is because of deep samskara, a deep impression, this fear of losing our place in the heart of someone we love.

When it becomes a little difficult to attain whatever you are attracted to, then we start loving… Have you noticed this? If you simply get whatever you are attracted to — just like that, quickly — you do not develop love for it. A longing must arise. That leads to love. But love brings the fear of loss.

A love which has the fear of loss does not blossom. It leads you to other ugly sensations and feelings. Jealousy comes. There is someone you love very much — a friend, a boyfriend, a girlfriend — but his or her attention is on someone else. See what is happening in your stomach — it is churning. You try all sorts of gimmicks to deny what is happening within you.

Unpleasantness arises because there is fear of loss.

Bliss is in growth, mindfulness and expanding your heart !!!!!